Becoming a Woman of Strength

By Zoe Elmore

Becoming a woman of strength has never been at the top of my to-do list. All that changed 18 months ago when I woke up one day overweight, overwrought and overwhelmed.

As I wrestled to pull on my slacks, I had a wake up call to sanity, and honestly, a little vanity. No longer could I blame the clothes dryer for “shrinking” all my clothes, I had to own up to the consequences of my lifestyle. For too long I had consumed too much sugar, too many processed foods, and too few fruits and vegetables. The only exercise I got consisted of running to the pantry for a snack. While this realization was hard to swallow, I committed to making some important lifestyle changes.

I began by transforming my perspective on loving the Lord with all my strength. The truth is, it’s not only a responsibility, it’s an act of worship. Romans 12:1 says, “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God, this is your spiritual act of worship.“ This verse exhorts me to sacrifice my desires for those of God. As I read this verse each morning I ask myself this question, “Will you worship the Lord today by choosing His desires over yours?”

“Working out” with the Word of God every day helps me do just that. Philippians 4:8 has particular meaning to me: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.”

This power verse challenges me to examine everything I put into my body, mind and spirit. Allowing God to renew my mind through Bible reading and prayer has caused a reshaping of every part of my life (literally and figuratively).

The next step in the process has been the most difficult for me – gaining strength in my physical body. Ugh! I’m just saying, this princess hates to sweat, I mean glisten! It makes my tiara slip!

Now I want to be very clear about the physical part of this process. My desire was not and is not to look like a model; after all I am a 5-foot-3-inch “fun size” curvy girl. The truth is, a strong physical body is not a vain thing, it’s necessary in order to complete God’s work for me. So how does a princess who hates to glisten begin?

I started by purchasing an inexpensive pedometer and clipped it on my clothing as soon as I was dressed each morning. It was my goal to walk 10,000 steps a day (that’s about five miles). You’d be surprised how quickly those steps add up if you park your car in the farthest spot from the office or store and take the steps instead of the elevator.

After a few months of walking, I added some weight training. I attempted a few women’s push-ups on my bedroom floor and fell face down into the carpet after doing only three. After months of practice, I can now complete more than 20 men’s push-ups without stopping. I lift weights three times a week and that has not only helped speed up my metabolism, it has also toned up those “angel wings” flapping under my arms.

In the last phase of the process, I began to adopt a lifestyle of “clean eating.” I removed all sugar, prepackaged and processed foods from my diet. Basically I’m preparing, not purchasing, the foods I eat. I try to drink eight glasses of water a day and getting enough sleep has been of great benefit as well.

From the spiritual to the physical, I have gone from overwrought to overhauled! Before I began this process, I could barely walk a mile without gasping for breath. I didn’t appreciate the spiritual importance of caring for my body, mind and spirit. I used to avoid physical exercise, and my craving for nutritious food was overshadowed by my desire for pre-packaged and over-processed sweet “stuff.”

My old eating habits left me unsatisfied and longing for something more. Eating clean has changed my food cravings and that unsatisfied longing for something more is a thing of the past. I’m now eating what I crave and craving what I eat (seeds, nuts, fruits, vegetables and lean protein). You might be surprised to know how satisfying nutritious, dense food really is.
This lifestyle is a life-long process and beginning each day with Bible reading and prayer to renew my mind is crucial to my success.

By doing the work of memorizing and meditating on power verses I’m no longer consumed by what I’m not. Instead, I’m focused on the work God is doing to reshape me from the inside out. Seeking God’s strength has transformed my focus and frame, and I’m now experiencing the satisfaction and excitement of loving the Lord with everything I have.

Zoë Elmore loves her life in Matthews, North Carolina, with her husband Tom, sons Joseph, Josh, and new daughter-in-law Kelsey. You will find Zoë perfecting her push-ups and polishing her tiara. She joined the Proverbs 31 Speaker Team in 2005. You can learn more about Zoë by visiting her blog at www.zoeelmore.blogspot.com.

For more encouragement, see the new health and well-being page of “Everyday Life” on the Proverbs 31 web site, http://www.proverbs31.org/.

Meet the Staff of Proverbs 31 Ministries

Why would a group of professional women choose to sit behind donated desks, coordinate their schedules in order to share office space, and work for a lot less money than they could make elsewhere?

One thing; well, one Person … His name is Jesus. Working at Proverbs 31 Ministries is more than a job and a paycheck to our office staff. Each beautiful face on the cover of this magazine represents an answered call to serve the Lord through P31.

There is not enough space to recite all the ways these incredible women sacrifice their time and talents for God’s glory. Each day they lay down their lives for women they probably will never meet. Amidst the ring of the phone, soft tones of prayer, whirl of shipping books, buzz of events being coordinated, and clicking of keyboards, we wanted to introduce our gals to you and ask them, What do you like most about working at Proverbs 31 Ministries?

LeAnn Rice, Executive Director
The moment I walk through the front door, I feel God’s grace flowing through my sisters. I am loved, accepted and encouraged every moment of every day. These women radiate Jesus in everything they say and in everything they do, and I am overwhelmingly blessed to have them in my life, and honored to work beside them. Oh … Wendy’s chocolate chip cheesecake isn’t bad either! And then there’s Barb’s baked potato soup … yum!

Samantha Reed, Executive Assistant
The grace of God shown by each of my co-workers. It’s strengthened and sharpened me beyond my years. Each one lives out the character of Christ in special ways, and I am honored to walk beside them, serving the Lord.

Teri Bucholtz, Resources Coordinator
Blessed is the word that comes to mind. I think about the many before me who have given so much to this ministry, and they believe God has used them to minister to those “out there.” They don’t realize what they have done for us staff “in here.” Their dedication has given me a livelihood that is meaningful, worthwhile and full of grace and peace.

Wendy Blight, Speaking Ministry Assistant
Every week I look forward to Tuesday morning because it is my day to work in the office. Spending the day with these girls is like a breath of fresh air. We laugh, we cry, we pray, we share stories and struggles, and oh, yes, sometimes we work.

Melissa Taylor, Administrative Assistant and Prayer Coordinator
The women I work with! I am also passionate about the prayer ministry. It is a wonderful privilege to pray with people from all over the world and watch God work first hand.

Holly Good, Personal Assistant to Lysa TerKeurst
I love connecting with many women all over the world. It is a pleasure to learn how God is moving in and through so many lives. He completely amazes me.

Terri McCall, Project Assistant
Working with women who are faithful, have a heart for God and are true prayer warriors is an experience of a lifetime. God knew I needed it. I’m humbled to be a part of this ministry as I continue my journey to wholeness and serve the Lord alongside these beautiful, godly women!

Leah DiPascal, Personal Assistant to Renee Swope
I love working with an incredible team of women who are passionate about their relationship with the Lord. It is a privilege to play a small part in helping women to discover their calling in life.

Kristen Sigmon, Radical Revolution Coordinator
I can’t choose just one, so I have two. The ladies I get to work with – each one shows me a different side of God and inspires me to be a more godly woman. I also love seeing God use our ministry to make a difference in teen girls’ lives.

Barb Spencer, Speaker Ministry Coordinator
God has brought a special group of women together at the Proverbs 31 office. As we each use our gifts, He blesses and ministry takes place. It is a joy and a privilege for me to be a part of this team.

Wendy Pope, Development and Gather and Grow Coordinator
I love our response to a need for prayer. At any given moment, someone could call and need prayer. I know because I hear Melissa praying with them. If the Spirit moves us, we all may come together in an office and fall on our knees to pray, right in the middle of the work day.

From our heart to yours, Merry Christmas. Enjoy celebrating the reason for the season, the reason we serve: Jesus.

When My Ugly Comes Out

By Lysa TerKeurst

I couldn’t even blame this one on hormones. It was just too much, happening too fast, in too condensed of a time period, with too many people determined to get on my last good nerve.
I’ll give it to you in two-word snippets. And while I’m running down my list, see if any empathy starts to find its way to your heart. I’m convinced if there is one way all us girls are alike, it is in the reality that life ain’t always so pretty.

Computer crash.
Birthday forgotten.
Starbucks closed.
Whiny child.
Stained pants.
Pounds gained.
Feelings hurt.
Tempers short.
Dog fleas.
Pantry ants.
Throbbing head.
Interrupted nap.
Sibling spat.
Time out.
Messy car.
Gas prices.
Urgent errands.
No time.
Doctor appointment.
Waiting room.
Waiting room.
Waiting room.
Misplaced belonging.
Futile search.
Hand wringing.
Messy kitchen.
Chores undone.
Laundry piles.
Paper piles.
Dinner flop.
Sheer exhaustion.

Can you relate to days like this? And yes, all that and more happened on my birthday. And all the girlfriends sighed a unified, “Have mercy.”

I really wish I could put a spin on how I reacted to all this, to make it seem more godly. I would love to share how I smiled and remained calm and didn’t yell at those I love and didn’t pout about the forgotten birthday. I would love to be able to say I took the high road and handled everything with grace as I shined my little halo.

But I’m afraid only one word describes my overall attitude: ugly.

Since days like that are a reality, what’s a girl to do? Especially a girl on a quest to live out the realities of Jesus in the midst of everyday life … everyday life that sometimes gets quite messy, inconvenient, ill-timed and ill-tempered, I might add.

She heads to the pantry to eat her weight in chocolate pretending she’s never heard the word “calorie” before. Simultaneously she also calls her girlfriend who she knows will understand her slurred words despite all the smacking in her ear. And she huffs and she puffs just wanting to blow her whole house down.

Oh I do know that of which I speak.

No, I was so spent after my little ugly meltdown I didn’t even want to head to the pantry. I didn’t want to forget the word “calorie.” I didn’t want to call my friend.

I wanted help. Real help. Jesus help. I picked up my Bible and got really honest with God. “Help me in this moment. Please Lord intervene in my natural flesh response right now. Block me from acting how I feel like acting and show me how to diffuse my frustration and anger.”

There were no lightning bolts. No booming voices. No phone calls telling me of instant fixes. And there certainly was no sudden loss of appetite where chocolate was concerned. So I waited.

From across the room, I heard my computer make a sound indicating an e-mail had come through. Since it was the first thing that happened after my prayer, I decided to investigate. I opened the e-mail and sat back stunned. It was an urgent prayer request for the family of a fellow author and blogger. She lost her battle with cancer.

As I clicked the link to her blog, it was shocking to see her name with two dates listed below it. One was the date of her birth. The other was a date I’d written on hundreds of forms and celebrated with many a cake; my birth date and her going-home date.

Because a blog is like an online journal, I was able to read much about her life. Things she thought and felt before she got sick, and after the diagnosis came. There were vibrant pictures of her doing life with her loved ones. There were hard photos of her in a hospital bed with loved ones singing hymns over her. All things that had occurred during that little dash between the two dates.

As I kept reading my friend’s blog, I stumbled across an entry written by her daughter. In the entry she told of a particularly hard day where she grabbed the Bible and cried out to God in much the same way I had just minutes before. Only the Bible she grabbed was on a shelf beside her dying mother’s bed. Her mother’s Bible flipped open to a page with a blue sticky note citing this passage:

“Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits - who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.” (Psalm 103:1-5)

I felt as if I was suddenly drinking living water from a fire hose. So many life lessons coming at me so fast. The biggest of them all was how easy it would have been for me to miss the answer to my prayer. I prayed for God to help me and to intervene in my natural flesh response. How easy it would have been to miss connecting the dots between my prayer and this e-mail. I suddenly realized that God is always present, always aware, always available and always actively participating in our lives if only we’ll make the choice to see Him … really see Him.

While my circumstances can still be frustrating and beg my emotions to get a little ugly, I know God is only a prayer away. The reality is that He is with me. All I need to sense His presence is to acknowledge it, ask for His help, and make the choice to praise Him despite my feelings.

Lysa is a wife to Art and mom to five priority blessings. She’s the award-winning author of 12 books who speaks frequently at national conferences drawing each listener into a unique adventure with Jesus. You can find her at: www.LysaTerKeurst.com where she blogs daily.

This article is taken from Lysa’s latest book, Bible study, and DVD teaching series, “Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl” being released by Zondervan this month. If you are looking for a fall Bible study for personal use or to use with a group, please see the back page or center envelope for ordering information.

When It Rains, He Pours

By Tracie Miles

I had begun to believe the old saying was true: “When it rains, it pours.” Doesn’t it sometimes seem that challenging situations happen all at once? As hard as I try to keep my eyes focused on Christ during these times, I still find myself getting bogged down with stress and drowning in a myriad of emotions. I cry out to Jesus saying, “Lord, why?” and “Lord, do you really understand how I am feeling?”

Recently I experienced a very stressful season in my life, when I was not only over-committed, but overwhelmed with stress. I had volunteered for a leadership role in my child’s school, which brought with it the impossible task of trying to please everyone. Others consistently challenged and confronted me, despite my dedication to do a good job. I began to feel less confident and fretted over people’s opinions of me. I allowed harsh words to hurt me and resentment began to build in my heart. At the same time, several of my family members were facing serious health issues. I worried myself sick over them as I fervently prayed for their healing. One of my children was dealing with a difficult problem with bullies at school. I was exhausted from the daily responsibilities of being a busy mother of three, wife, coach, church leader, speaker, writer, maid, cook, laundress and taxi-cab driver.

I found myself praying the same prayer every day, repeatedly asking God to “fix” my problems. I was physically, emotionally and spiritually spent. I desperately needed to know that God saw me, and yearned for comfort and the reassurance that He understood my feelings. In the midst of the pity party that I had thrown for myself, God spoke two very important truths to my heart that I will never forget.

The first of these truths was a gentle reminder to pray for Christ-like joy and not rely on my circumstances to dictate my happiness. I began to recite Psalm 51:12 each day, “Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me” (NIV). It didn’t happen immediately, but it did happen. I gradually began to feel God’s precious joy returning to my heart. I realized that although people had said and done things to hurt my feelings, my battle was not with flesh and blood, but with the enemy. It suddenly became clear that I had allowed the ungodly actions of a few people to steal my spiritual joy, and God prompted me to seek joy in Him alone. He could have changed my circumstances at any time, but instead His desire was to change my heart through my circumstances.

The second truth was that Jesus did understand. I had been studying about a very stressful day in the life of Jesus that is so important, all four Gospels contain the story. On this day, Jesus awoke to a peaceful morning, which quickly changed into one of chaos:

• He learned of the death of His dear friend, John the Baptist
• King Herod was after His head
• He retreated to the sea alone to grieve and pray
• Upon returning to shore He found a celebration among the disciples and believers, encountering up to 25,000 hungry men, women and children
• And later that evening, His disciples were frightened in a fierce storm in the sea. He walked on water to join them, and then invited Peter to walk on water. Unfortunately, as Peter took his eyes off Jesus, he began to sink. Jesus reached through the crashing waves and rescued him, despite Peter’s lack of faith.

Jesus began this day like any other, but faced many painful and unexpected situations. He was overcome with grief and felt anxiety for His own safety. He also felt loneliness, jubilation and crushing disappointment. Jesus was tired and overwhelmed. He was God in the flesh, and although His situations were different than those we may deal with in our everyday lives, His emotions were the same.

When you feel as if you have reached your limit and can’t make it through another day, know that Jesus understands. Our circumstances may be difficult, our lives may be stressful, and people may hurt us, but His joy and comfort are always available in great abundance if we keep our eyes focused on Him during the storm, and seek His unsurpassable joy and peace with our whole heart.

Romans 5:5 says, “And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us (NIV).” It may seem like it is raining stress in your life, but take comfort in knowing that God is always pouring His love upon you.

For the Least of These

By LeAnn Rice

“She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.” (Proverbs 31:20)

God’s heart for the poor and needy is clear throughout Scripture. So clear in fact that Jesus tells us when we serve “the least of these” in Matthew 25:40, we are actually serving God! It’s not that I forget verses like Colossians 3:12: “Clothe yourselves with compassion…” Or Matthew 5:7: “God blesses those who are merciful…” It’s just that somehow I got so wrapped up in my own little world that I was overlooking the fact that millions of people go to bed hungry each night.

In the past, I was so busy whining about my house being too small (not enough closets for all my stuff) that I was blind to how many people have no home at all. Is this the attitude God desires from me? Have I become so concerned with the contents of my closets that there’s no room for clothes of compassion, kindness and mercy?

God put a stop to my whining this past summer during a mission trip to Ecuador with ten members of the Proverbs 31 speaker team and Compassion International. Loaded down with food, school supplies and clothing, we were bringing much-needed supplies to the poorest of the poor. As ministry partners with Compassion International, we were also anxious to see the work they were accomplishing in Jesus’ name. What I saw was the love and hope that can only come from Jesus in the eyes of sponsored children. His love, in their eyes, opened mine.

From the moment I stepped off the bus at the first project center, I was swept into the presence of God. I met Ecuadorian Christians who are teaching children about Jesus while offering health care, tutoring, and vocational training through Compassion International. Most of these children live in small homes with dirt floors and no bathrooms. But they and their families have hope. They have been introduced to One who promises to never leave them, and His love shines brightly in their lives. They are grateful for what they have and willingly share their meager portions with those who have even less.

I was graciously welcomed into homes constructed of concrete, dirt and sheets of plastic. Homes with no running water or refrigeration. Homes where two to four children share a bed, and others sleep on mats on the floor. Homes that you and I would deem unlivable. Homes where all were welcome in the name of Jesus.

On Sunday morning, I sat on a creaky old wooden pew in a humble church in Pucará de Velásquez. Next to me sat a man whose eyes twinkled as he looked at me and said, “Amigo es Jesus.” My new friend and I worshiped together, unified through our relationship with our best friend, Jesus Christ. In a community where the average adult earns only $150 a month, far less than the cost of basic needs, this church overflows with songs of praise and worship. They don’t think about what they don’t have … they focus on what they do – they have Jesus and He’s enough.

The trip was soon over and I returned to my small house and asked myself some tough questions. Was I so dependent on the conveniences of my American lifestyle that I had become desensitized to the needs of anything or anyone outside of my small world? If I was stripped of all my worldly goods, would I be filled with as much hope as I saw in the eyes of the man with whom I shared a creaky, wooden pew in the mountains of Ecuador?

My journey to Ecuador had taken me from my small world and my overcrowded closets to homes with dirt floors and no plumbing. There I witnessed genuine compassion, kindness and mercy among the poorest of the poor and, as my blinders were removed, I was humbled beyond measure.

I pray that my “mission” trip remains so impressed on my heart that I never forget the God I met on that mountaintop – A God that wants us to share His compassion for “the least of these” – A God who is calling me and you to open our arms to the poor and extend our hands to the needy – a God who teaches us about Himself and His heart in the most unexpected places.

Thank God for Smelly Shoes

by: Lysa TerKeurst

The art of thanksgiving is one that we should teach our children. I'm not talking about how to cook pumpkin pie and turkey. I'm not talking about decorating with cornucopias, dried corn stalks and scarecrows. What I'm suggesting goes beyond setting a candlelit table with fancy linens and fine silver. While those are all artistic ways of expressing the day of Thanksgiving, I'm talking about the attitude of thankfulness that can be so easily overlooked. I'm talking about the art of saying "thank you," every day.

I am so blessed. But I sometimes get so distracted by the blessings that I forget to thank the One who delivers them. Do I see the loving husband I've been blessed with or do I just grumble about his faults? Do I see the creative child I am blessed with or do I just grumble about her artistic messes? It's easier to grumble about the sweaty laundry, than see the health of a son who can play sports. Do I see the home I am blessed to have, or do I grumble about the constant chores to keep it clean? Sometimes I'm more tempted to murmur about the many housekeeping chores I have, than to be grateful for the home and the ample supply of food we have.

I decided I wanted to get more intentional with expressing my thankfulness. I also wanted to get more intentional with developing an attitude of thankfulness in my children. I want the words thank you to fall so easily from their lips that it's second nature. I would like for them to thank the Lord for people they know, and even those they don't, with ease.

Realizing I must model what I teach, I decided to assess how thankful I really am. As I made a mental list of those things I was thankful for, I became distracted with the unusual number of out-of-place shoes scattered about my home. Not so spiritual, I know. But the shoes seemed to be coming out of the woodwork and screaming for my attention. I went from having a full heart focused on God to becoming a grumbling woman feeling frustrated and drained. How many times do I have to pick up shoes? Is this what the journey of motherhood will be like for me? A never-ending cycle of picking up shoes and putting them back, again…and again.

From where I was sitting, I counted over 14 pairs of shoes. Upon further inspection, they were everywhere - by the back door, the front door, in the laundry room, in the hallway, in the kitchen, by the dog dish, on the stairs, in the guest bathroom, in my bathroom, on the floor in the kids' bedrooms and even in the linen closet. To say I was frustrated was an understatement. Visions of chore charts and consequences for leaving things out and about, danced through my mind. I even went so far as to think this was yet more evidence that my kids are not as thankful as they should be. Kids who were truly thankful for their shoes would care enough to tuck them into their closets.

As I mentally chided my children for their ungratefulness, I felt God gently give me a piece of my own reprimand. Was I modeling thankfulness in this moment? Was I exemplifying the gratitude I wanted my children to experience in their lives? Scattered shoes are a normal, everyday thing with a hidden treasure about them. It's all in how I choose to look at these shoes which will determine whether I feel drained and frustrated or filled up and thankful.

I stopped and thanked God for these shoes … this evidence of life. Some had grass and dirt on them as proof our kids are healthy and strong enough to run and play. Some had scuffmarks from one too many dances on the concrete outside. Some had teeth marks from our beloved dog, Champ, whose favorite pastime is chasing kids, balls and stray shoes. One had paint on it from a school project. But all were well-worn, broken in, and definitely used.

So, here I am, making life's journey in this season with soccer cleats, princess shoes, basketball high tops, teenager wanna-be boots, kitten bedroom slippers and gymnastics flip flops. It's funny how these shoes tell stories of life, if only I choose to listen. Games won and lost, girlhood fantasies, dreams of the future, comforts of home, and expressions of style.

Maybe you've felt a little frustrated with the shoes scattered about your home as well. But the next time you pick them up, instead of letting frustration whisk you away, listen carefully to the story they tell. Listen carefully and thank God for each and every precious soul that wears those shoes.

So, what about my thankful list?

I eventually got back to that. I'm thankful for the gift of our Savior.

I am thankful for my husband and kids. I am thankful for friends and extended family. I am thankful for our home, full of life and lots of activity. And strangely enough, I'm really thankful for shoes … especially the smelly ones!


Rejoicing in His Amazing Love,

Lysa

This article is taken from Lysa's book, "The Bathtub is Overflowing, But I Feel Drained," available through Proverbs 31 Ministries.,